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Exhausted

pashtx

I guess I should start off by saying Happy New Year!! 2020 started off normal for my family and I guess yours too…but shortly after, smh……OMG LOL all’s I’m going to say is “Rona”. Fast forward a year later, we have all been at home for a year now, kids have been doing virtual school, my husband has been working from home for a year now, and Jayden is in his second semester of college. I count myself blessed every day that my family and I wake up, that we are all healthy and in sound mind. COVID-19 did hit my family, Jayden did catch COVID-19 in August of 2020. As expected COVID-19 ran through Texas Tech’s football team like a wildfire. We count ourselves very blessed because Jayden was asymptomatic and did not show any signs and symptoms of having it, he just tested positive. Jayden has been in school for one semester. No one told me it was going to be this hard when your child goes off to college, yeah, I know you are supposed to miss them…. but I am grieving the loss of my son not being here and it is hard. He is doing good and I am/we are immensely proud of him, but my heart aches because I cannot see him every day.


Wesley and Peyton have been rolling with the flow of things with virtual school, I think Wesley has gotten the better end of the deal. All his teachers bless their hearts are there every day toughing it out, risking their life on the accountability to teach my child. Peyton’s teacher’s have been there too, every day, in the classroom. Peyton had one teacher that was out due to illness (not COVID-19), and finding teachers are extremely hard now…especially a teacher that can teach Spanish….so this was hard for me as a parent to see my daughter learn Spanish from watching video’s (do not get me started). I am ready for the kids to get back to school, I am ready for things to get back to normal, BUT not at the expense of their life, so until they get a handle on “Rona” the York’s will be homebound.


Lately, I have found that I do not have a drop of energy, I feel like when I get off work at 2 PM that I could sleep for the rest of the night. I do not know why; nothing is changed in my daily life none other than I am not as active as I have normally been due to everyone being at home. I am like God!! There is so much that I want to do, there is so much that I need to do…. I just don't have the energy to get it going. I finally finished Peyton’s Allergy Shield of Hope’s website!!! Yay!! I really want to quit my job, yup I said it…. I want to quit my job and focus on my nonprofit 100%, but I cannot do that right now because I must have some sort of means of being able to pay myself….and right now I do not have one sponsor. So yeah, that's another thing I need to try and figure out too.


Who would have thought that when we started our nonprofit a few short months later, COVID would hit…and all the big idea’s that I had planned would have to be shelved? Now, here we are a year later….and those big ideas are still shelved because COVID has not went anywhere. I feel like my plate is running over, but at the same time I am exhausted and can't keep up. I guess the only thing I can do is keep pushing…that’s the only thing I know how to do.

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